Wow! I could go in several directions at this point….. I guess I’ll start with this.
I’ve learned that someone’s word is not a small thing. It’s a reflection of respect. And when that trust is broken, no matter the situation, I have to step back ~ not out of anger, but out of self‑respect.
But I want to be honest about something. That’s the calm, cleaned‑up version above.
Inside, there’s still hurt, anger, and confusion that have to be worked through when trust is broken. Stepping back doesn’t mean those feelings disappear; it means I take the time to sit with them, sort through them, and not carry what someone else’s choices placed on me. Something I would never do to someone ~ yet it’s nothing for them to do to me ~ is really something to consider.
Because when I step back in, I will be different. I’ll be guarded. I’ll be aware. I’ll be self‑protective. And I will no longer give the benefit of the doubt freely.
WHICH brings me back to the beginning ~ when I was hopeful, optimistic, and apparently very trusting.
Back in July of 2025, I began working with an illustrator for my children’s book. I was hopeful and patient, believing that with time and communication, things would come together the way they were promised.
As time went on, progress slowed, and communication became less clear. Deadlines shifted, updates were pushed back, and “next week” became a familiar response. I tried to stay flexible and understanding, assuming that patience would eventually bring my dream of having my children’s book finally brought to life.
Eventually, it became clear that the progress I had been promised wasn’t happening. So I made the decision to step away and request a refund. I was asked to reconsider, with renewed promises, reassurances, and a commitment that things would finally move forward. Wanting to believe in second chances, I agreed.
What ultimately brought clarity was a comment that the work had gone “over and beyond” simply because I made edit requests. Mind you, despite all of the “next week” responses I received, this person never actually went through the editing and discussion process that should have happened along the way. Instead, the last minute rush to meet the second chance deadline seemed to interfered with personal plans.
I didn’t respond to that email, and I won’t. At that point, I was done! Had I responded, though, I would have simply clarified what “over and beyond” meant to me: going over by twenty weeks and well beyond the original projected timeline of September 2025. And the date it was finally done? January 31, 2026. So in a way, I guess this person is somewhat correct. They said in July the illustrations would take “roughly 6-8 weeks,” and yet here we’re at the end of January. So yes ~ they certainly went over and beyond!
Stepping away means the illustrations are now in my hands. It may take longer, but this feels right. I am working through the illustrations in Procreate ~ learning, experimenting, and giving myself time as I go. It’s not about perfection; it’s about moving forward and staying connected to my dream of this children’s book and the many more to follow. The joke’s on that forgotten illustrator, because I have so many stories waiting to be brought to life. And now, they’ll be illustrated under one name ~ Mine.
While I work through the illustrations, my private family collaborator, D.D.M., and I will continue adding new children’s stories. Storytelling has always been the steady part of this journey, and that hasn’t changed. If anything, I want to keep sharing and creating memories that won’t be forgotten ~ especially for my grandsons. This isn’t how I planned things to go, and there have been other wrenches thrown in along the way, but this is the path I’m on, and I don’t plan to leave it.
I’ll leave this here.
“Trust is built with consistency.” – Lincoln Chafee